Sunday, April 11, 2010

"We are weak, but He is strong...." (Feb 3, 2009)

My inspiration today is the song "Jesus Loves Me". Why He put that song on my heart, only He knows. I have really been struggling with why I am supposed to do these things He laid on my heart recently. The task seems so impossible, but He keeps pushing me along to do what I need to do.



For instance, I have been battling that same junk that has been going around. Poor little Natalie even has it. Normally I would be down and out with no energy at all. That is not the case. In fact I have more energy right now than I have had in months.



One of the stops on my journey, as I like to call it, is to share my life with anyone who takes the time to read my blog. I am not big on speaking in public, but God has given me the gift of being able to express my feelings in words. (At least I think it is a gift.)



I accepted Christ at a young age. Like most people I strayed away and came back again. Almost four years ago, I was at the lowest possible point in my life. I was trying to fix my life all by myself and I was becoming more and more depressed with each passing day. One day I reached the breaking point and could no longer cope with the life I had created for myself. I gave up. I tried to end my life. 48 hours later when I woke up in ICU my first thought was not that I had failed, but that I was important enough that God was giving me another chance. That was the day I vowed I was going to start my life over. It has taken me four long years to turn 38 years of misery around. I did not do it by myself. My Daddy God put the right people in my life to encourage me and help me along. Don't get me wrong I am not 100% where I need to be. I am still a work in progress, but I know that if I can come back from the lowest point in my life I can strive to become the woman God wants me to become.



When I was at my weakest point, He picked me up, dusted me off and gave me a second chance at life. I thank Him for that every day. Sometimes I look back to all I would have missed out on if He hadn't thought I was important enough to save.



I have been blessed with a dear friend that is more like a little sister to me. Right now she lives in Arkansas, but I don't let that stop me from keeping up with what is going on in her life. Her little boy just turned 3 years old. I can't even imagine missing out on the joy he has given me. He calls me Nonnie and every time I hear him say that my heart leaps with joy.



Another blessing in my life is my dear, sweet niece. My nephew hit the gold mine when he found her. They have a baby girl, my great niece, that is 1 1/2 now. I can't believe she is fixing to be 2. She makes me smile so big. I don't get to see her as often as I would like, but when I do I make the most of it.



To my whole family's surprise, my baby brother and his wife told us last June that they were expecting. I remember when they told me. I screamed and cried louder than I ever have before. The joy of knowing that my baby brother was going to be a daddy still bring tears to my eyes. That sweet little angel was born 3 weeks ago. I can't wait to watch her grow up.



My most recent blessing came as a true gift from God. I don't make friends very easily so I was surprised when I was blessed with a new friend. She is such a joy to me. Come to find out she pretty much lives around the corner from me. It is still pretty amazing to me how all this happens. Every day our friendship becomes stronger and stronger. It feels like I have known her for so long. I am comfortable around her and I can truly be myself. Her and her husband are expecting their first baby in a few weeks. An extra blessing on top of our new friendship.



I am so glad the when we are weak, He is strong. I am so glad that He didn't want me to miss out on all these blessings and more. I am thankful that He allowed me to have the rest that I needed so that I could be a better person, wife, sister, aunt and friend.

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